I booked the retreat in the hope to heal stored trauma’s that have led to repeated bouts of unexplained ill health and depression. Seeing the beautiful surroundings in the photos and noticing the additions of breathwork and cold water therapy made it stand out amongst others.
Words cannot express how grateful I am that the universe led me towards Neils and Femke. Some people were born to provide such safe and nurturing spaces, and these two wonderful people certainly have this magic aura.
It was beautiful to have the opportunity to speak to Neils before the retreat and hear his own personal story and experience. It reduced anxiety and made me feel in safe hands. It was also lovely to connect to the group via the WhatsApp group a week prior so we were able to say a brief hello and organise logistics-it meant I was able to meet a couple of people for a shared drive from Amsterdam and this also put me at ease.
The retreat house is stunning and holds a really special spiritual energy. The beautiful weather also meant we were able to enjoy the stunning garden and safe little nooks and cranny’s for moments of silent reflection when needed, or to enjoy group chats around the fire pit. I spent the whole time barefoot which I love!
Letting go was a big theme for the 3 days-no phones, no clocks, no chatter about itinerary and ‘what next’. Neils and Femke delivered this with such care that it didn’t feel like a difficulty, I felt like I was in safe and experienced hands the entire time, and truly felt like what was meant to be would happen.
There were various exercises to help us to build real connection and trust within the group from the offset and boy did it work! I felt like I was part of an understanding family and there was never any feeling of discomfort or pressure. We all came with different personalities and experiences, some of us lacking confidence especially in group scenarios, so it was testament to the experience that we all felt that we had a voice and a space.
I haven’t even got to the core parts of the retreat yet, but I felt it important to emphasise the holistic and wholesome way that the experience was facilitated.
What surprised me was the power of the breathwork. Neils is passionate about teaching different techniques that we carried through the whole experience. It felt like a beautiful grounding to what was to come. The playlists and Neils words and energy were also constructed so perfectly and I had the most surprising and powerful release even during the first session.
The microdosing was a lovely way to meet the medicine and hand over my trust to it in preparation for the main ceremony the next day. And wow what can I say about the ceremony…it was my first experience of psychedelics so of course there was some uncertainty, but being in such a lovely environment, and being nestled in my weighted blanket with my eye mask on felt nurturing. Neils and Femke were there to hold my hand when I needed it, to play beautiful instruments, and I felt an intense love and so many things I can’t put into words and would want to keep as mine so I won’t even try to describe the ‘trip’ but suffice to say, it answered the questions I needed. It was beautiful and ‘waking’ to see Neils and Femke was like waking to two angels, they actually glow with such a loving energy.
Further breathwork gave me yet another powerful release the next day. In three days I have cried, laughed, sobbed, and felt the calmest and most at peace than I have in my entire life. I am really hopeful that I can take these gifts into my life, and with the support that Neils, Femke and the gorgeous group will provide during the next couple of weeks during the afterglow period, I am confident that this will be a life changing experience.
I thank them from the bottom of my heart.
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